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Well Intentioned But Well Off The Networking Mark….

By June 25, 2018January 17th, 2019No Comments
J. Kelly Hoey - Build Your Dream Network

A recently ignored, eye-rolling WTW email….

X — You should meet Kelly. Kelly is a rockstar and invests in female founded tech companies.

Kelly — X is in town for the next week wrapping up her round and looking for some strategic capital. You should meet her.

Flip to page 202 of Build Your Dream Network and the subchapter “The Dump and Drive” (it’s in the Chapter on Networking #Fails and for the sake of the strength, utility and resilience of your network I beg of you to take it to heart).

In short: Never ever, as in never-ever-not-on-your-life-under-any-circumstances assume.

Especially if you haven’t seen, heard, talked to the person in a while.

And take the time to sniff around to see what someone is up to (as the last time that rockstar was doing what you’re seeking help on today could be something that is now WELL in their past).

Discover the intersection of VALUE in the introduction. Yeah, the intro is good for (or needed by or sought out for) X but have you looked (or given a moments thought to the other side of the equation?).

Just because someone has the means, capacity, contacts, track record, history, passion — WHATEVER — does not mean they can or will act on your behalf now.

Lives change. Life gets in the way. Interests meander.

Lots of other people may have made the same ask and now the network is fatigued.

Reputational capital is not something that comes quickly or easily (and is definitely NOT something to be doled out at the drop of the hat — remember this as you should actively question anyone who flippantly offers to make “you two should know each other ” intros).

And read from page 202 to 204 of Build Your Dream Network (again).


This post originally appeared in BUILD YOUR DREAM (my weekly newsletter). Don’t miss my next musing by signing up to get BUILD YOUR DREAM in your inbox.

J. Kelly Hoey

J. Kelly Hoey is a problem solver who believes that most professional challenges—whether funding, landing a board position or getting a new job—are solved by tapping into networks.Kelly is a popular speaker on networking, community building and investing issues, especially as they relate to women, and has worked with the IEEE, PGA, Bank of America, Apple and countless others. Follow Kelly on Twitter @jkhoey and on Instagram @jkellyhoey and join the #BYDN community at