Skip to main content
AdviceCareer adviceCareer tipsLife lessons

From My Inbox: September 25, 2023 Edition

By January 14, 2024No Comments
J. Kelly Hoey - Build Your Dream Network

Do you have a CV of failures? As I’m sure I won’t find any missteps highlighted on your LinkedIn resume or the social media bastions showcasing toxic positivity success. I know I don’t celebrate or advertise my f’ck-ups.

We’re told to “fail fast” yet, heaven forbid! we ever own up to failing, at anything, even if endless mistakes/trials/attempts/experiments (aka failures) lead to valuable lessons/discoveries/novel outcomes/improvements etc. etc. etc.

So, I’m offering a (very) short list of my failures:

  • An interview for the Ms Teen Victoria contest (a f’ck-up on so many levels – failing to listen to what I wanted (and being in a local talent/beauty contest was not one of things I aspired), failing to see that I was a competitor, failing to push off outside pressure on what I should do….which spiraled into narrowing my vision for my possibilities).
  • Not making the field hockey team in 8th grade (in the absence of feedback on how to improve, I gave up the sport completely – an epic fail!)
  • A written french exam in 9th grade (didn’t tell my mom which compounded the shame when my report card came out) then many many algebra quizzes in the 12th grade (though I managed a scrape out a pass – just barely – in the end! Capital P on the report card for the win!)
  • Two marriages (I won’t list anything about my dating life, as it seems I fail spectacularly at intimate personal relationships!)
  • Advancing in the legal profession beyond associate
  • Scaling a start-up accelerator (along with the partnership which surrounded it)

Confession. While this list was difficult to start writing suddenly, it was a cathartic breeze when I got going. Try it (or do as I did, take a listen to Learning From Your Mistakes, then write your own list).

Now, back to good ???? From My Inbox:

When you tell your brain ‘I want to find something,’ it commits more cognitive energy towards finding it.

  • Taking a Wonder Walk (Creating A Wow Filled Life)
  • Gender equality in politics 80 years after Australia’s first female politicians elected (Women’s Agenda) – spoiler alert: 46% of elected politicians in Australia are women
  • Thriving After Failing: How to Turn Your Setbacks Into Triumphs (HBR)
  • These are the barriers women entrepreneurs face in SA (The Citizen)
  • 600+ resources (and growing) for women entrepreneurs & investors (Yawbryd)

ICYMI…read this if you are wondering if it is OK to ignore random LinkedIn queries.

Being socially dominant, being achievement-striving and focused on improving one’s own lot in life by themselves are not all that problematic and tend to be valued by Western cultures

  • What Is Narcissism? Science Confronts a Widely Misunderstood Phenomenon (Scientific American)
  • The play deficit (Aeon)
  • Dazzling timelapse shows how microbes spoil our food – and sometimes enrich it (Aeon) + while you’re at it, I suggest watching the Earth episode of acclaimed food writer’s Michael Pollan’s series Cooked.

+ check out this book rec, ‘cause yeah, rejection, like failure can be the best outcome.

J. Kelly Hoey

Networking Expert + Career Transformation Coach + Author + Speaker, Kelly Hoey looks at "networking" through a new, modern, fresh lens, offering you (who are pursuing and perhaps struggling with your big ambitions), advice on how to connect for success in a hyper-connected world that is woefully short in its attention span. Her network-building advice is relatable, instilling confidence with actionable insights and practical information.